Posted by: everynation | November 13, 2007

Love Handles

by Jeff Bullock

jeffbullock.jpgLove handles are the bulges around the waist that are hard as heck to get rid of and I find it increasingly difficult to lose them. In fact as I get older I actually have to workout longer than I used to, to maintain a certain weight (that is none of your business to ask about). Though the pressure to look better at every age presses upon us to get rid of the love handles, I am acutely aware of my need to keep some “love handles” in my life to grip Love and make it more of a reality in my life.

We think spiritually masculine men don’t talk about love they talk about faith. Softer men talk about love and are a bit like milk toast when it comes to faith. Yet Paul, (I received 39 lashes and have been beaten senseless), the Apostles said that faith works best through love and Jesus, (I died on the cross), the Christ said the unchurched will know you are My disciples if you love each other. Love must be one of the hardest things to get a handle on because we aren’t that good at it.

Let me quote the Holy Ghost… if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing…Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails… 1 Corinthians 13

Love can be done. It can be done well. It is achievable, attainable, remarkable, enjoyable, difficult-able, emotional, ridiculously reasonable, illogical and logical. Love is practical.

A Few of Love Handles I am trying to get a grip on

The Kindness Handle
Man… I hate having to be nice all the time. When people aren’t nice to me, do I really have to be nice back? Even when driving? Mostly I’m a nice guy but some things tick me off. I have to tell myself…don’t return evil for evil. (How about just a little not niceness and repent later?) I think kindness means being nice, especially when people aren’t being nice. When kindness is demonstrated and expressed it really has powerful results. It can turn away anger and invoke mercy. It can catch people off guard expecting retaliation but receiving patience. It’s a good handle. I’m going to grip it.

The Patience Handle
If it weren’t for people I’d really like being a Pastor. I’m just kidding. I love being with people. I’m a people person. I don’t do alone well. I always like having someone with me to do most things. It’s lines I don’t like. And traffic. And trying to returning things to stores and trying to buy things in stores. The other day it took almost 5 hours to return a wireless router. Today Ana (my wife) and I went to purchase matching floor lamps for the church facility… they had one. We were buying a table … the table is purchased in sections (don’t ask why you buy it in sections)…they had only one section. I don’t need this in my life! Evidently I do. Love is patient.

Not Provoked Handle
Golf is not the only sport that exposes the heart. I played golf with a pastor friend of mine. After teeing off on the 9th hole he threw his one wood down the fairway. The club went straighter and further than the ball. I can get so frustrated and angry at such small things. Rob Bell says we get angry at things that don’t matter at all and we don’t get angry about things that do. Guilty your honor. I’d really like myself better if the little things didn’t bother me. I think discontented people are easily provoked. They feel they just don’t have in hand what they need, but they actually do and don’t know it. God has given us everything pertaining to life and godliness. I can do this thing called love.

Jeff Bullock is the author of “The Pub” and is currently planting a church in Budapest, Hungary.


  1. I really hate lovehandles. So glad I finally got rid of mine.

    I really like your blog though – Been reading for almost two hours now. Please stop posting so good posts, hehe…

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